The Expendable Spoon

When my friend Chris was leaving for his epic European backpacking trip, our friend Howard gave him a spoon to take with him.  I asked him why a spoon and here is what he said (as I understood it):

When we are young and just getting started in life we buy what supplies we can on our limited budget.  Cheap silverware, maybe mismatched plates from the thrift store, whatever we need.  As we get older, we are able to have more stability and maybe we graduate to a house, car, matching silverware.  So the old stuff gets thrown in the back of the drawer.  But every once in awhile, we may have the opportunity to go on a trip or do something that requires packing a lunch and we need to take a spoon with us.  We don’t want to risk losing one of our nice pieces, so we grab the old forgotten spoon from the back of the drawer because it is expendable.  We go on our trip, come home, wash the spoon and put it away, back in the forgotten recesses of the drawer.  Next time we need an expendable spoon, we grab that one again, and it comes with us on another trip, another adventure.  Over the years, our nice silverware gets used, washed, and put away, but this old spoon gets to go on all the adventures with us, and after awhile, it starts to take on meaning.  We start to attach fond memories to it and it becomes more than the old expendable spoon, it becomes the adventure spoon.  That’s why he gave our friend a spoon, to teach him that the ordinary can take on an extraordinary new life.  

As I reflected on that story, thinking what a great concept that was, he added: maybe some of us are like that, we are the oddballs, the expendable spoons, but we go on the greatest adventures.  

My friend is a genius.

(Clever spoon photo, courtesy of Chris Domingo
Spoon story courtesy of Howard Martell)

Thailand Top Ten

TEN THINGS I WILL MISS ABOUT THAILAND

1. Coconuts are delicious, especially a chilled one on a hot day.  Cut the top off and stick a straw in and you have a magical drink that is extremely healthy as well!  Then you can take a spoon and scoop out the meat from the inside and it is very filling.  I love coconuts!  And mangoes.  Actually, all the fruit is amazingly vibrant and flavorful.  
2. Street food, especially fried bananas, yum!  Samosas, roti, coconut ice cream, pad thai, cashew chicken, meat kebabs, Thai iced tea, smoothies...
3. Bowing.  The Thai people put their hands together in the Namaste gesture and bow as a way of being polite.  I loved it!  It felt so nice to bow and show respect and goodwill with just a simple gesture that everyone understood.  Politeness is very important there which was really refreshing.  I found the Thai people to be amazingly patient with me and I enjoyed interacting with them and they seemed to enjoy teaching me about their culture.  
4. Decorations.  Everything there is decorated, the rooftops, the fences, there are altars and offerings and statues everywhere.  It makes everything so interesting.  It’s going to be boring looking at plain old buildings again.
5. Inexpensive prices - it really is amazing how cheap some things are.  You can get a meal for $.75, clothes and shoes for $6, haircut for $7, taxi ride for $6, songtaew ride for $.60, rent for $100 a month and up. 
6. Tuk tuks and songtaews.  Public transportation is incredible there, just stick out your hand and flag one down, they are everywhere.  I will miss being driven around in a tuk tuk and feeling like a princess! (A songtaew is a converted pickup truck with a cover on the back and two benches along the sides.  You tell the driver where you want to go and hop in.  It's a very efficient and cheap way of getting around.)
7. Speaking three languages in one day and somehow making it work. (English, French, and Thai)
8. Elephants and tigers and water buffalos, oh my!  And the cute little geckos.
9. Monks everywhere.  It was so cool to see the monks in their orange robes walking around everywhere, doing normal things like shopping at the mall or riding a songtaew.  It's like a reminder of the spiritual in the everyday life.  I also was honored to get a blessing from a monk at the temple, which was a really nice experience.
10. A general feeling of spirituality, history, and culture everywhere you go.  Lots of festivals, blessings, offerings, and rituals to make every day sacred.  Also a laid back feeling and a slower pace of life.  Things aren't rushed, they happen when they happen.  Sometimes that was frustrating but for the most part I was able to relax and go with the flow.

TEN THINGS I AM EXCITED TO GET BACK TO/WON’T MISS ABOUT THAILAND

1. Remedies that I am used to like Ibuprofen and Tums.  Couldn't find anything like them over there.    
2. Mexican food, mmmmm.  Any kind of beef for that matter.   
3. Drinkable tap water, not having to worry every time I brush my teeth or wash something out.  
4. Mayonnaise - the mayonnaise there is disgusting!  I don't know what they did to it but that’s not mayonnaise!  Also tomato sauce is weirdly sweet, like they didn’t quite get the recipe right.
5. Pest Control!  Clark, I needed you in Thailand!  No disease carrying mosquitos or deadly snakes/spiders/insects/arthropods everywhere you turn.
6. Air conditioning.  OMG the HEAT!  Dying of heat every freaking day! Sweating and sweating and all the restaurants are open air, aargh!  Eating under fans with ants all over your table.  Ugh!  Covered with ant bites, better than mosquito but still not fun.
7. Clean streets.  There is a serious trash management problem there, which probably doesn’t help the rat/cockroach situation.  And general OSHA/FDA oversight.  They’re not perfect but they’re better than nothing.
8. Smoking everywhere.  I couldn't get away from it whatever I did.  The best I could do was try not to breathe too much of it in.  
9. Seeing the people I love and have missed, not just on Facebook, although that was pretty fun.
10. Freedom of speech and the freedoms we take for granted.  Life is hard over there and they don't have the basic freedoms we take for granted.  This is the first time you'll hear me talk about this because I was afraid to say anything while I was in country.  It's not a joke, the government can do anything they want and the people have little to no rights or recourse.  That general unsafe feeling weighed heavily on me while I was there and I can tell you I am so thankful to be an American citizen!  It's not perfect here but we are so very fortunate to have the freedoms that we do.  

The Thailand I Read About

This week I moved into a new place, a guest house called Mango House.  It is located inside the old city, which I have never considered before.  Everyone I talked to said to avoid the old city, that it was dirty and I wouldn't like it.  I guess that's a lesson learned, it's always good to investigate for yourself, no matter what people tell you.

The guest house is located on a very nice street called Moonmuang Soi 9.  It it a residential area with trees and plants, houses and animals, and lots of little restaurant-shacks and other businesses like massage parlors, tattoo parlors, hair salons, laundry shops, convenience store-shacks, and a ton of other little random stuff.  I wake up in the morning and go across the street and order an "American" breakfast; eggs, toast, fresh fruit and orange juice.  People walk by on the street who look like they just rolled out of bed, hair sticking up, clothes all rumpled, looking like they desperately need a cup of coffee!  That's what I love about here, there is no pretense, no makeup, people just show up as they are.  This morning I was eating and one of the staff came out, apparently from the shower because her head was still wrapped in a towel, and started taking orders. I call them shacks; they're not exactly shacks but they are certainly not restaurants like we have in the states.  As far as I can tell, there is a house in the back and they put up a shelter, like a carport in the front, with a kitchen and chairs and tables.  When they close, they just pull down a giant metal rolling door and lock it all up.   I have a very nice room here, it is all decorated in blue.  You can see the beautiful painting hanging above the bed in the picture.  The rest of the room is blue as well, and it makes for a very soothing atmosphere when I get home hot and sweaty from the day.  The bathroom is tiny as you can see, that's it.  There is no shower like we have in the states, when I want to take a shower I close the door and use the shower attachment you can see on the wall and the whole bathroom turns into a shower.  Actually I think it's a really smart space saving design and pretty easy to use once you get used to it.

Thai class is going well and I am now able to carry on a basic conversation in a restaurant with limited English.  So that’s fun!  The Thai people are very gracious about my attempts to speak Thai and genuinely seem pleased that I am making an effort.  They are very helpful and often teach me a new word or give me hints when I am not sure. Also, in an unexpected turn of events, I asked the owners of the guest house, who are French, if I could practice my French with them.  I didn't know if they would be keen on helping me, as I have had limited success with other French speaking people.  But to my pleasant surprise, they are gracious and even enthusiastic about helping me with my French!  So around the guest house, we speak mostly French, then I go out and speak Thai in the markets and restaurants, and speak English with my friends.  This is a dream come true for me.  I have always been in awe of people who speak more than one language (and even a little jealous).  I feel like I am finally getting clear on what I want to do with this next season of my life, and becoming a polyglot is definitely at the top of my list. It is exciting, I finally feel like I'm where I want to be and starting to develop into the person I want to become!

Housing, Tai Chi, and Temples

This week has been one of waiting and searching for new roach-free housing.  I really wanted to stay in the area called Nimmanhaemin where the roach condo was but the more I looked, the more expensive it was getting.  Most of the condos and apartments here are as expensive as Sacramento!  I did not come here to pay that much money. So I kept looking. (Picture: This beautifully decorated tree is in a courtyard with restaurants and shops that I recently discovered.  Most people come out at night to hang out because it is so hot during the day.)  While all that was going on, I also started Tai Chi classes at a little studio just inside the old city.  It’s in a really nice neighborhood with lots of little shops and shacks and I thought it would be interesting to move there.  I hadn’t considered the old city yet because until now I wanted a condo with a kitchen so I could cook.  After the condo drama I have changed my criteria.  I have given up on the notion of a kitchen, it’s just so rare here (read: expensive).  I started looking into the guest houses but what I found initially was not inspiring.  So I just sent out a prayer that God or the universe would lead me to something.  I was walking down the street after tai chi one day and a voice called out to me “are you looking for a room?”  I wasn’t thinking about that at the moment so I said “no thank you” and kept walking.  About a block down the street, something was bugging me.  So I walked back.   This is one of my favorite pieces of graffiti I have found. The place was painted bright orange and had a sign that said Mango Guest House.  I told the man “yes, I would like to look at your rooms.”  He took me upstairs and showed me.  The room was painted a beautiful sea blue and had an elephant decal on the wall.  He said I could get a room with air-conditioning if I wanted.  I said yes, absolutely.  I asked him if he had cockroaches.  He is French, and didn’t understand the word.  So I showed him a picture on my phone.  He jumped and said “Non, of course not!  My place is clean!”  I said “good, because I don’t like cockroaches.”  We made a deal that I would move in on Wednesday and give it a try for a month.  So next week I will let you know how that is going!

While that was going on, I have been doing some fun things.  I started my Thai classes this week.  The first day we went over greetings, how are you, what is your name, etc.  The language classes are Mon, Wed, Fri and on Sundays there is a cultural component.  This Sunday they took us on a field trip to a local temple!  It was really cool, they gave us flowers to place on the buddha statue (see above picture), then we went inside the main temple.  At the front you could buy bowls of coins and there was a long table with 100 or more bowls lined up and you walked around in a circle and dropped the coins in the bowls.  I don’t fully understand the history and significance of it, but it was very meditative and I thought about all the bowls representing all the blessings in my life and just thought about being grateful.  Another thing I did was get a blessing from a monk.  Usually women are not allowed to touch monks but in this case, I knelt in front of him on a mat and he sprinkled me with water.  The I held my arm out and he tied a braided string on my wrist.

So things are going pretty well, there have been some mishaps and detours but it’s all part of the adventure!

#Roachfail

To follow up on last week’s newsletter, I had found a couple of roaches in the bathroom and wasn’t sure how that situation was going to unfold.  The next night I found another roach and killed it.  I went back to watching tv.  A couple hours later I went back in the bathroom and there was another one!  I screamed out of surprise and frustration and killed that one.  That night my nerves were shot and I hardly slept at all.  In the morning I walked down the street to the smoothie shop, bought a smoothie and used their restroom.  I know that sounds crazy but I couldn’t go back in that bathroom.  I went back to my condo, booked a hotel for the night, and packed an overnight bag.

At first my plan was just to give myself one night without giant roaches.  It probably sounds like I’m overreacting, and I had a lot of people on Facebook say “what’s the big deal, they're just bugs.”  When I was a kid I had no problems with bugs. I would spend hours in my grandparents’ yard climbing trees and playing in the dirt and looking back I must have been covered with bugs.  When I matured, something happened and I became squeamish around insects and downright terrified of spiders.  I don’t understand it, but there it is.  So for me having roaches scurrying around me is terrifying.  I say this with the full understanding that I am very lucky to have lived in nice places where I did not have roaches and I could afford pest control.  I am fully aware that millions of people in this world don’t have that luxury and have to cope with all sorts of vermin.  So believe me when I say I am deeply grateful for having access to clean housing. Back to the story.  I spent the night in a cute little hotel called Hug Nimman.  I was still really jumpy at every movement and scared to go into the bathroom.  I hit the good ol’ Google search and read up on roaches.  What I read was not good.  Apparently they can get anywhere and everywhere, and when you see one, there are thousands lurking nearby.  I thought they were just in the bathroom, and so far they were, but I didn’t want to take my chances of all my possessions getting infested.  So I decided right then and there to leave the condo.  I went the next day and very carefully packed the rest of my things and brought them over to the hotel and booked three more days.  Fortunately hotels are cheap here, not as cheap as rent and not an expense I had planned for, but do-able.

So now I am in my hotel room trying to figure out my next move.  I am disappointed, I really liked that little condo and I was really getting in my groove of cooking and getting settled there.  I also feel like a bit of a failure for not being able to make it work.  But all my bug phobias aside, roaches are a significant health hazard and it just wouldn’t be safe or smart to stick around.  So I am looking for newly constructed apartments or condos that are hopefully roach free.  Hopefully I’ll have some good news for you next week!

Laundry and Water and Cockroaches, Oh My!

Now that I’m all unpacked and settled in my condo, it’s been quite an adventure figuring out how to get services.  First, I inquired about laundry.  Here in Thailand, most folks don’t have washers and dryers like we do in America.  Instead, people take their clothes to laundromats or full service laundry shops.  There is one at the entrance to my condo, so I asked them how much for laundry.  They quoted me a price (I don’t remember exactly how much) for washing.  I asked “what about drying?”  They said no.  I asked them how I was supposed to dry my clothes and they said I could take them up on the roof and dry them.  I wasn’t about to do that, so I asked my friend who lives here how he gets his laundry done.  He referred me to a husband and wife team that will pick up and drop off.  Perfect!  Then lady is very sweet, her name is Sopa.

The front of my complex Next I needed to sign up for water delivery.  The tap water is not safe to drink here, but getting bottled water every day from 7-11 was turning out to be a hassle, so I inquired.  For 50 baht ($1.50 US) I get 20 one-liter bottles delivered to my door.  And the cool thing is they are re-usable.  When I’m done, they bring me a new crate and they take the old ones, sterilize them, and re-fill them so it cuts down on waste.

The big department store here is called Central, and it is located in a mall called Kad Suen Kaew.  There are other malls that are more Westernized but I like this one because it is a mix of Western and Asian shops.  I have bought a saucepan and frying pan along with some kitchen instruments and things like salt, pepper, and olive oil so I am able to do some cooking in my new kitchen.  I am working on accumulating all the sauces and things I need to try some recipes from the cooking school.  I’m not quite there yet but I have been cooking pasta, eggs and potatoes, and things like that.  It’s nice not to have to use a microwave for everything.   I am learning how to get around, and which transportation to take for what.  For the more common areas, I can take a songtaew, which is a red pickup truck that has been modified with a cover over the back and two benches inside.  Those are by far the cheapest.  I can get from my place to the mall for 20 baht, or about 60 cents. Next up are the tuk tuks, they range from 100 to 200 baht, roughly 3-6 dollars.  They can go places the songtaews can’t, so I generally only use them for more out of the way places.  Then there are the air-conditioned taxis, exactly the same as we have in the U.S.  They are about 200 baht, and I take them when I am hot and tired and just want air conditioning!  I also take them to and from the airport.   One little problem I have not solved is cockroaches in my bathroom.  I am grateful that they are not in the kitchen or bedroom.  However, they keep getting in the bathroom, big ones about 1-2 inches long.  I have cockroach spray which helps.  Tomorrow I am going to ask my guy to look into it for me.  There's only room for one in this condo: me.  On another note, I just purchased a mosquito zapper and tonight I had my first opportunity to use it.  It worked like a charm and the mosquito was incinerated with a satisfying POP!  I think that is going to become a permanent addition to my bag.

Getting Settled in a Chiang Mai Condo

Hi all!   I made it back to Chiang Mai in one piece and the next thing on the agenda was to sign the contract for my new condo!  I had spent the week before I left looking at places with an apartment broker.  I was looking for something small with a kitchen.  What I found out was that most apartments and condos don’t have kitchens, just a fridge and a microwave.  I finally found one in the location I wanted, an area called Nimmanhaemin, which is preferred by foreigners because it has easy access to lots of restaurants and shops. The little one bedroom condo I found is right in front of a construction zone, so the owner was having a hard time renting it.  They’d been doing construction on the apartment building behind my condo in Sacramento for years and it wasn’t that big of a deal, so I decided to go for it.  This enabled me to get it for almost half price, quite a good deal (8000 baht = $245 US per month)!  What’s funny is that it’s not the construction that is the loudest, it’s the planes.  There is an airport nearby and I swear, half the time I think they are going to fly right through my window, they are so loud!  So that’s something to get used to.   Other than that, I love this place!  It is so cute and perfect for what I need!  After all my exotic (and expensive) travels, I need to take a break and save some money so I am going to stay here at least six months, go to my Thai classes, try to learn how to cook and whatever else I discover during my stay here.  It is nice to have a place to call home again and have some time to really dig in and learn about Thailand on a much deeper level than just a tourist.  I am looking forward to what I will discover!

Operation Thai Visa

Hello from Vientiane, Laos!  It was my intention to be back in Chiang Mai by now but things didn’t go as planned.   I left Chiang Mai on Tuesday the 14th and came here to Vientiane, Laos to apply for a six month education visa.  What that means is I signed up with a school that offers Thai classes that cater to foreigners and helps with the visa paperwork.  So when I get this visa, I will be able to stay in Thailand for six months without having to do what they call a “visa run,” whereas people on regular tourist visas have to renew every 90 days.  In exchange, I agree to take a certain number of hours of Thai classes, which will be helpful for me to navigate and communicate while I am in Chiang Mai. .

Statue in front of the temple across the street from my hotel in Laos.

The first complication was that last week was the new year celebration for both Thailand and Laos, which meant most offices were closed for most of the week.  There was nothing I could do about it, my Thai visa was set to expire on the 18th. I checked the official website of the Thai Embassy in Vientiane, and it showed that they would be open Wednesday and Friday.  So I decided to buy a one way plane ticket in on Tuesday, get settled in my hotel, drop off the paperwork on Wednesday and pick it up on Friday.  A little bit about Thai new year.  It is called Songkran, and Chiang Mai is one of the most popular places for celebrating it.  The traffic in Thailand is already ranked one of the worst in the world and during Songkran, it turns into absolute mayhem.  On top of that, a traditional way to celebrate Songkran is to go out with a bucket or water gun and splash everyone you can.  So the city basically turns into one huge drunk water fight.  Hundreds of people die in traffic accidents and thousands are injured.  Many foreigners, like myself, hide away during Songkran for safety.

The tuk tuk drivers have these ingenious hammocks that get stored on a bar under the roof when they are working, and can be brought down for them to relax in during the afternoon when it is hot and they are waiting for clients.

What does this have to do with my trip?  I had to take a taxi to the airport, which would mean going out during Songkran.  I wanted to be safe, plus I heard rumors of the traffic being so backlogged it could take up to four hours to get there.  So I hailed a taxi at 8am to avoid the mayhem, which usually starts in midmorning.  My plan worked.  It took us 15 minutes to get to the airport, which means I wouldn’t miss my flight but now I had all day to wait, since my flight was at 3pm.  Most of the staff looked at me like I was crazy when they saw how early I was but I just made my way to the lounge and did some reading.  It wasn’t too bad and before I knew it, I was on my way to Vientiane.

This is not my photo.  I rarely use any photos but my own, but I wanted you to get an idea of how Buddha Park is laid out.

Wednesday morning rolled around and I had all my paperwork ready to go.  I hailed a taxi and off we went to the embassy.  We got there and there was a sign on the gate saying they would be closed that day and reopen on Friday.  Dang.  That meant that I would have to extend my stay here until at least Monday, assuming there were no other unexpected delays.

Since I had some downtime on Thursday, I did go see a place called Buddha Park.  Basically it’s about an acre of land that has huge stone sculptures of Buddha and various other deities scattered about.  It was fun to walk around and take pictures.  So that was one touristy thing I got to do.  I’m really glad I did, it was a lot of fun! Friday morning came and once again I got all my papers ready and went down to the lobby to call a taxi.  I asked the receptionist and he said "sorry, no taxi."  What???  I looked at him and said "Please, I really need to go to the embassy this morning."  He shrugged his shoulders.  "Please, it is very important!  I must go now!"  He sighed and picked up the phone again.  In a few minutes, he said "ok, taxi come in 15 minutes."  I bowed and said "Thank you so much!"  Apparently he had called someone who lived near the hotel and was on his day off.  He got me to the embassy and I successfully submitted my paperwork.  I paid him double his fee and that cheered him up.  He said "if you ever need a driver, call me!"  Visa processing takes one business day but since I dropped it off on Friday, I would have to wait until Monday to pick it up.  I spent the weekend relaxing and doing a bit of exploring around the hotel but nothing big because it was so hot and I didn't want to do a tour.

As of this writing, it is Monday afternoon and I have successfully secured my Visa and am able to re-enter the Kingdom of Thailand!  I have booked a plane ticket back to Chiang Mai for tomorrow so tonight is just for me to relax.  After a stressful week of wondering if and when I was going to get that Visa I am ready for some down time!

A Journey of Change

I am sitting here in my room in Chiang Mai at the beginning of my journey wondering where it will all lead.  I suspect I am not the only one who sold everything and moved to an exotic country that wonders what have I done and what does my future hold?  I have flung the door of my future wide open and ask nothing except that whatever I do brings me happiness and health.  I have stepped far away from the track of planning my life, any illusion of certainty, into a life of going where the wind blows me and trusting that it all works out in the end.  I was looking out the window today at a rainstorm and sitting in the knowledge that I am at the beginning of a journey that will change me, is changing me.  I will not know the full effects of this change until later when I look back at the person I was when I started and the person I will become as time goes on.  It is exciting to know that it is happening now, with every experience I have, every trip that scares and excites me at the same time.  

I have already noticed some things about myself as a traveler.  I have long known that I have some obsessive compulsive tendencies.  These make me a great organizer since I like to have all my ducks in a row and have a plan b and c.  I pay attention to my surroundings, I remember where I put everything and notice if something has been moved.  On the other hand, I like to have things just so, to be in control, and to have all the supplies I can think of at hand for every given scenario.  That is nearly impossible when traveling unless I want to bring extra suitcases with me.  Rather than giving in to that impulse, I limit myself to one suitcase, pack what I think is the most important and make do with what I have.  That is a good skill for me to learn.  I think part of that compulsion toward being prepared is a good thing; it has helped me many times.  But there is a dark side to it, which is wanting to have all eventualities covered out of fear that I will need something and not have it.  So I am finding a balance between being prepared and trusting my resourcefulness and ability to adapt.  

I want to continue to grow, to become more self-sufficient and adaptable, to learn how to achieve the same results with less or at least with whatever I can find wherever I am.  I love learning about ways people cure common ailments in different countries,  the foods they eat and the customs they practice.  I already love my expanding knowledge of geography and how to traverse all the places I have been to and this is just the tip of the iceberg.  So here’s to life and learning and following your heart no matter now frightening that can be!