New Eyes

So last week has been a huge push to get my condo painted and all the little loose ends tied up so we can list it, which we are going to do this week, probably Friday.  For a couple of days I was getting stressed about the details, and of course the suspense of not knowing exactly when it will sell and to whom.  So after being woken up with a migraine one morning at 4am I decided to take a step back and see what I was doing, which was getting wrapped up and losing my perspective.  Saturday after my weekly Tai Chi class, I went to Crepeville, a handy little restaurant one block from my condo, and treated myself to a nice leisurely breakfast.  As I was walking back, it dawned on me that this is my last weekend in Midtown, at least before my condo is staged and on the market.  This is the last weekend that I will have walking access to all these restaurants and shops that I have come to love and depend upon in the last eight years.  So I slowed down and really looked at everything with new eyes and savored all the sights.  When I got back to my condo, I did all the chores and projects with gratitude, as an expression of love for this place that has been such a blessing in my life.  What a change!  No more headaches.  It’s amazing what perspective will do, and how our body is so good at communicating what we need to hear, if only we slow down and listen to it.  

The more hopeful my future is, the less I find I desire to hold on to my past

My new digs for the next few weeks

So this week I officially moved out of my house and am on to the next phase of my journey which is essentially living out of a suitcase.  I have gotten my wardrobe down to the basics, and now I’m trying it out to see where I can cut even more.  I’m spending all my free time in my condo to finish up all the fixes to get it ready for market.  The plan is to list it right after Labor Day.  As I have been going through my stuff (and getting less and less patient and just wanting to make it all disappear, yes, even me!) I have been really evaluating what I have kept and why.  The traits that make me a good organizer also cause me to keep multiple copies of things just in case.  In case of what?  One great example is pictures.  I was going through pictures on my computer and realized that maybe one out of 20 was really great and the rest were just there for what?  Context?  So I went through and picked out the outstanding ones and deleted the rest.  How many pictures do I need?  Is is sufficient to just have a few outstanding pictures of someone I love and not 200?  As the world moves more into the digital age and information is available more readily on the internet, I find that I am holding on to things far less.  Also, the more hopeful my future is, the less I find I desire to hold on to the past.  That was a big epiphany for me.  I held on to a lot of things from my parents and grandparents, who are all deceased, because that’s what I was taught to do and at the time, it was comforting.  But now that they have been gone for many years I find that I hold the memory of them in my mind and I don’t need all these physical reminders of them.  I still have things I inherited and pictures, don’t get me wrong, but not nearly as many.  But I am glad I took the time to surround myself with those things to help with my grieving.  I believe that our spirit knows when it is ready to let go of stuff, and even though we get impatient, it is important to give ourselves space and grace for healing, adjusting, and spiritual growth.  Even exciting spiritual growth like starting a fresh new life!  

So what’s next?  More wrapping up of details here in Sacramento.  I know you are all curious as to where I am going to go, and I do have some ideas I am looking into, but have not made up my mind.  I will let you know as soon as I find out!  

Change happens, whether you engineer it or it happens to you. Either way change is guaranteed.

After this experience I am even more ready to simplify!  All the stuff, multiples of everything so that there is one in each room, all the furniture I had to house all the stuff I never touched!  All I can think about is, I don’t need this much space and I don’t want to do this much work to maintain it!  

I have gotten rid of two loads of furniture and I have professional movers coming in the morning to take the rest either to my storage unit or my sister’s house.  My sister has a big family so they are graciously finding homes for a lot of my furniture, which is a big help.  I am storing a few things because I have no idea where on the spectrum I am going to end up.  I may very well wind up with some sort of house that I can put furniture in and if that’s the case I have a few pieces I would like to keep.  

Even with that in mind, I am sure that after my journey my perspective will have changed so much I will have different feelings about what I want to keep.  I have a suspicion it will be a lot less than I am keeping now.  But I think it’s important to go through the process.  I was having a conversation with friends today and they were tickled that I still don’t know where I am going and don’t seem to care.  It made me think.  We are so concerned about knowing every step of the way and figuring out (what we think will be) the final destination.  But that is not usually how it works, even if we think we have the answers they usually change.  All we need to know is the next step.  I also think that if we keep an open mind, different things will be revealed to us than if we insisted on sticking to some sort of plan.  I am not advocating being irresponsible; anyone who knows me knows that I cover all my bases.  But that is different than thinking I have to know the end before I even begin.  It is very freeing to know that as I move through this journey I will learn things I never imagined and that will inform my next steps.  

It's going to be extraordinary!

Excerpt from "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" as they are on the bus in India for the first time:

          EVELYN

          D'you think we're going to be

          alright?

          GRAHAM

          God, don't ask me. I'm more

          scared than you are.

          (They both smile, sit in silence for a bit)

          GRAHAM (CONT'D)

          Yes. I think it's going to be

          extraordinary.

I was watching this movie again tonight as a sort of inspiration for my upcoming trip and this line struck me.  I have had a lot of different reactions from people when they hear about my plans, from excited to shocked, from telling me they wished they could go to trying to talk me out of it.  So let me tell you how I’m really feeling.  When I made the decision to go, I knew in my heart it was the right decision and I was very excited.  Then, as packing went on and I tried to imagine what items I would want and which I wouldn’t, I started to wonder.  What will it be like?  Where will I go?  There was one night that I got a little impatient with packing and wished it were done already.  But in that same moment I realized, sitting in my beautifully decorated bedroom that has been my sanctuary these last eight years, I need to be in this moment.  Before I know it, the packing will be done, the condo will be sold, and I will never see it again.  So don’t wish it away.  Thoroughly enjoy every minute of the process and don’t worry about how long it’s taking.  It will be done soon enough, and I will be on to the next thing.  I have never been overly attached to places, so moving is not too difficult for me. I will miss this place, but I come full circle to why I made the decision to do this in the first place and I still know in my heart that it is the right decision.  It’s surreal, packing up everything that represents the first 36 years of my life, trying to imagine what it will be like living out of a suitcase.  It makes me look at the world differently.  I have practiced zen focus and being in the present moment, but I believe that this decision is causing me to be even more present and slow down even my everyday movements.  

The packing of the “stuff,” the items, is almost done and I am moving into making arrangements for the furniture and cleaning the condo to get it ready for market.  There are lots of little details to work out but I am making nice progress and things are going smoothly.  Until next week!  

I'm moving!!!

You may have heard through the grapevine that I have recently made an announcement!  I am making a big lifestyle change.  So many people are surprised and curious, I thought I would tell you the story behind this decision.  

I started down this path when I quit my corporate job and opened my own business in April of 2012.  The first two years were spent understanding how to run a business, getting all the proper licenses and insurance, and working out the details of my business.  Towards the end of the second year one of my clients who had become a friend had been to so many Tony Robbins UPW events that she ended up joining his team.  She started Skype coaching clients all over the world and having a blast!  It sounded amazing to me and opened up a whole new world.  I signed up with a Tony Robbins master coach and did a six month program with her.  

Having read all these self help books and business development books, I was noticing that many of them said that I needed to get a clear, specific vision about what I wanted.  Until that time I had no idea.  I had general ideas, I wanted to be happy, I wanted schedule freedom, I wanted to help people, and I wanted to make enough money to live comfortably. But nothing really specific about exactly what that looked like.  Once I learned about online coaching however, the vision started to come together.  

I realized that moving my business online would give me a lot more freedom and flexibility.  I absolutely love working with clients one on one in their homes, but it is physically demanding and I didn’t want to limit my options in case I couldn’t or didn’t want to work that way any more.  So towards the end of year two I started looking into online options and expanding my social media profile.  

During this time, working on developing my specific vision for my life and business, I had been toying with the idea of someday doing more conservation work and getting back into nature.  I am exactly 50% city girl and 50% country girl.  I love the city, being close to everything, and the variety of people you meet.  But I was raised in a country setting with animals and gardens and nature and part of me misses that.  So I was thinking, maybe in five to ten years I would buy a house with more land so I could garden or something.  

A few things happened that sped up my timeline. In June I took a business trip to Scottsdale for a mastermind with my marketing coach.  That trip changed my life in many ways, none of them what I expected (is a life change ever expected?)  The trip was more expensive than I had thought it was going to be, so I wound up charging a credit card I had just managed to pay off.  Also, we spent a lot of time discussing lifestyle.  I came home and realized that I already had been living the lifestyle we had been discussing and that I was ready for the next step.  I was ready to get out of debt and stay out of debt.  Also, as I was pondering debt and money, I was sitting in my beautiful condo in Midtown Sacramento which I have thoroughly enjoyed thinking, I don’t need this much space!  

Next I read the book “Everything That Remains: A Memoir by The Minimalists” by Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus.  It is a beautifully written book describing how the author quit his corporate job and got rid of most of his possessions and now lives a minimalist life.  I thought it was great but told myself I wasn’t a minimalist.  Then I read “Rich Dad Poor Dad” by Robert T. Kiyosaki and became even more determined to get and stay out of debt.  

After that it kind of snowballed.  It was a few days before I came to the conclusion that I was going to take that trip now instead of five to ten years from now.  

So what does this mean?  What is my plan?  I don’t really have a specific plan as of yet.  Since I am spatially oriented and an organizer, I started with my condo.  I have spent the last week going through all my stuff systematically, deciding on what to keep and what to get rid of.  It’s been a fascinating process.  I take my clients through this process, so it is interesting to go through it myself.  Probably by the end of this week I should be ready to put the condo on the market and decided where I want to go.  I am going to spend some time (a few months perhaps) exploring, visiting various organic farms and eco-friendly housing communities.  I have a general idea that I want to live somewhere in a temperate climate, grow some or all of my own food, maybe have some small livestock, and generally live off grid and reduce my cost of living drastically.  I don’t know how much of that will survive my research or where I will end up.  So I am going to keep blogging about it and if you like, you can come on my journey with me!  I know it’s going to be an adventure and I can’t wait!