Should We Cry Over Spilled Milk?

I don’t know about you, but I quit crying (for the most part) a long time ago.  It seems not the proper thing to do in our society.  What do we do when children cry?  Get them to stop.  I know I’m not the only child who heard ”if you don’t stop crying I’m going to give you something to cry about!”  (Admittedly, not the healthiest or most supportive of responses.  I come from the era where parents took their children into public restrooms to spank them).  Later as a teenager, my outbursts were frowned upon and I was told that I was being unreasonable and overreacting.  And in martial arts, you don’t show weakness or pain, and crying?  Out of the question.  You. just. don’t.  As a single woman who lives alone I don’t bother to cry because who would hear me?  And it doesn’t change anything.  Or so I thought.  As I have been suffering these migraines, I have discovered an interesting thing.  I have been trying to get more in touch with my emotions, which are buried so deep I don’t even know where to begin to look for them.  In that process I have been allowing myself to cry.  And there have been a couple of instances where the crying has actually reduced the pain a little bit.  When I tell this to my well adjusted friends who know me they laugh and say of course!  That’s the point of crying!  But you have to understand how foreign this is to me.  Even though I am grudgingly accepting the idea that crying is healthy, it’s hard for me to do it.  And it’s been so long I fear I will burst.    

A good update: I haven't had a real migraine since Tuesday which is such a relief!  Still having some headaches but it appears that the work I am doing with the various healers I am working with is making a difference.  I am hopeful that it will get better and better!  

I would love to hear your reactions and/or thoughts on how you handle pain or grief.